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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28204062">Emergence</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TranquilBloom/pseuds/TranquilBloom'>TranquilBloom</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Death Note &amp; Related Fandoms, Death Note (Anime &amp; Manga)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>5+1 Things, Ambiguous Relationships, Angst, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Light Thinks a Lot, M/M, fluff for a weird reason, i don’t know why this is so long, it’s hard to explain</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 23:54:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,309</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28204062</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TranquilBloom/pseuds/TranquilBloom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>5 times L initiated physical contact with Light, and one time Light did. </p><p>Or, more like, 5 times L initiates physical contact with Light, <i>causing him to spiral into confusion as he considers L’s true motives,</i> and one time Light does.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>L &amp; Yagami Light, L/Yagami Light</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>122</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Emergence</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first time it happened, it was as unexpected as it was inappropriate, at least from Light’s perspective. </p><p>They had been arguing, the source of their disagreement quite evident—as the majority of their fights, both verbal and physical, tended to follow the same structure. </p><p>A statement would be made by Light, which would be followed up with a comment from the other party. Naturally, the former would find said comment very unsavory, and retort with a “That <i>doesn’t</i> make me me a murderer, Ryuuzaki! If it did, more than half of the general population could be”, or a “That’s immoral, Ryuuzaki! You can’t just allow something like that to happen!” or even a “I can’t believe you, I thought you stood for justice!”</p><p>Afterward, they’d either come to blows, or the (physical) fight would be preemptively broken up—the latter leaving bitter glances and huffs to be made by an undisclosed member of the pair (Light), and intentional sulking and small yanks on the chain that bound them in a passive aggressive manner by another (L). </p><p>At this particular time, they were in the third stage of said sequence, Light’s voice raised louder than typical, ranting, one scathing remark from L away from slamming his fist into the aforementioned’s face. </p><p>“—seriously, Ryuuzaki, what do you think that’s going to change? Even if I <i>was</i> Kira—which again, I’m <i>not</i>, don’t you think that’d be in vain?! At this point, instead of actually trying to solve the case, I think you’re more concerned about—”</p><p>Light <i>felt</i>, more than intentionally <i>caused</i> his words to come to an abrupt halt, the sight before him haunting him into uneasy silence. </p><p>The corners of the detective’s mouth were curved upward, in a manner that the teen could best describe as <i>creepy</i>—although he found the term childish, no other better suited descriptor came to his mind with the exception of it. His lips were propped open by the index finger hanging between them, while the already peculiar pair of eyes, wider and more pronounced than usual, seemed to bore holes through Light’s skull with the intense focus they procured. </p><p>“Ry-Ryuuzaki...?” He found himself stuttering, unable to form a complete thought. “Why are you looking at me that way?”</p><p>L made no move to respond, only remaining in the same, eerie position he’d suddenly morphed his facial features into, mouth still slitted open it what would be construed as a smile, had anyone else been the one wearing it, but, for some reason, seemed like a death warrant on someone like Ryuuzaki. </p><p><i>What the hell is he doing?</i> The first and last time he’d ever seen that expression upon L’s face was right before the sly detective pickpocketed Misa’s cell phone, and then arrested her under the suspicion of being the second Kira, both binding and blindfolding her, then leaving her in an otherwise empty cell. </p><p><i>Oh no. What was he planning?</i> Due to his previous experiences, that expression was a surefire premonition that something unfavorable was about to occur. Last time, the detective’s eyes had been locked upon Misa’s. <i>Now, they were locked upon his.</i> This certainly couldn’t mean anything good. Was he L’s next target? Though not having thought much about the face since last time, he quickly realized how grateful he was to not have bore witness to it in the time that had elapsed since.</p><p>“Ryuuzaki,” he tried again, this time with more forced confidence inflected in his tone. “What are you staring at me like that for? Cut it out, it isn’t funny.”</p><p>Again, L made no move to alter his expression, remaining as still as a statue—thoroughly disturbing Light in the process. </p><p>“Ryuuzaki,” he attempted for a third time, adding a more stern timber to his voice. “I’m being serious. What is the reason that you—oof!”</p><p>His question was cut short by a black and white mass being hurled toward his chest, briefly blurring his vision and almost causing him to fall backward. Simultaneous gasps escaped from various members of the task force, whose presence Light had momentarily forgotten about. He swiftly caught his balance on the back of his heel, then instinctively clutched his arms around the mass, helping to steady himself and preventing the object from falling as well.  </p><p>Opening his eyes so he could better process what exactly had just happened, he was met with a muddle of unruly, black tufts pressed firmly under his chin, and thin, sturdy arms which held a vice grip around his torso. </p><p>“Ryuuzaki?!” He exclaimed in confusion, all but baffled. <i>What the </i>hell? <i>L was strange, but this was beyond the level of idiosyncrasy that he normally partook in. What was the reason for this? What was he accomplishing? It had to be a test of sorts.</i> His heart sped up considerably in his chest. <i>But what kind of information would he be able to gauge from this? His reaction couldn’t be an indication of whether he was Kira or not. If he immediately pushed L away, would that make him seem more like Kira? Or would it make him seem innocent, as Kira would want to keep him close in order to seem blameless?</i> Regardless, he wasn’t Kira, but he still didn’t understand this investigative pursuit of Ryuuzaki’s, and didn’t want to do anything that would enact more suspicion against him in the detective’s mind, although he was mostly sure that was already a moot venture. Heart now pumping vigorously against his ribcage, his lips parted in confusion. <i>No, he didn’t understand this test of L’s at all.</i></p><p>Suddenly, a cough from the center of the room, sourced from one of the task force members in that area, shattered the uncomfortable silence, including the youth’s thoughts, instantly bringing him back to the present, and reminding him once more that they were still tangled together.  Without further delay he removed his arms from around the frail <i>prick’s</i> body, shoving him backwards at arm’s length, doing his best to ignore the patches of heat he felt flaring against his cheeks. </p><p>“What the <i>hell</i> was that for, Ryuuzaki?!” he demanded, eyes strictly on L’s to avoid the embarrassment that would come with meeting the <i>definitely</i> confused gazes of the others in the room.</p><p>The uncanny grin, sinister smirk, whatever, had fallen from the man’s face, replaced with his usual blank stare, although the finger remained in his mouth. He cocked his head sideways, something about the action conveying coyness, and somewhat of an innocence that Light knew to be false. </p><p>Mind racing, unsure of what exactly to say, he waited for a moment, then realized how much more awkward it was that he wasn’t saying anything at all, just holding L by his shoulders as the detective stared at him, the perfect image of purety, naïveté. Light was quite unaccustomed to a situation being out of his control, let alone controlling <i>him.</i></p><p>
  <i>He did this on purpose.</i>
</p><p>“...Don’t do that again,” He warned, although his tone conveyed more of an empty threat than anything. With that, he turned and walked away, the chain following laxly behind him. </p><p>When he turned to look, after they were out of sight from <i>most</i>of the task force, he glanced behind him, only to see the detective with that despicable expression plastered on his face once more; a cheshire grin upon his face. </p><p>
  <i>Bastard.</i>
</p><p>A nervous laugh erupted from the room after they departed, somehow increasing the aura of awkward tension in the air. </p><p>“What a pair, the two of them, huh?” Matsuda asked cautiously, scratching at his head as he did so. When he received no response, save the irritated grumbles and dismissive grunts from his coworkers, he hummed defeatedly and sat back down at his desk, looking to continue his work.</p><p>---</p><p>2.</p><p>The second time, it was a bit more expected, but still perplexing in its own right. </p><p>They were heading to bed for the first time in the tower. Well, the first time <i>both</i> of them were going to bed. They had been in the tower for about a week now, and Ryuuzaki hadn’t slept once, at least according to Light’s knowledge. </p><p>On the second day, he’d placed mental bets on when he’d finally find L asleep. The third day had passed, then the fourth, then the fifth. By the sixth, he’d given up hope that he’d ever witness the insomniac slumbering, not that it mattered anyway. However, his doubt was proven invalid on the seventh night, when Ryuuzaki informed him that after they showered, he himself would go to bed. </p><p>“Oh, alright,” Light had replied nonchalantly, but was beaming with apprehension on the inside. </p><p>As odd as the detective was, in all his mannerisms, behaviors, and conduct, there <i>had</i> to be something bizarre about the way in which he slept. Light didn’t know why he was so invested, or why exactly he was interested in finding out what it was, but it went without saying that he certainly was. </p><p>L had led them toward the drawers, briefly unchaining the two so that they could dress in their nighttime attire, then chained them together once more. Sitting on the bed, Light waited for L to follow, then pulled the covers atop himself, watching the other expectantly. </p><p>“You may go to sleep now, Light-kun,” L said from beside him. </p><p>“Right,” he replied, laying on his back and pretending to get comfortable. “Goodnight, Ryuuzaki.”</p><p>“Likewise, Light-kun.”</p><p>L began to lay down as Light watched him inconspicuously out of the corner of his eyes, through barely cracked eyelids. The detective dropped onto his side, back facing the teen, with his legs curling up to his midsection and a hand squeezed beneath his head.</p><p><i>That’s it?</i> Surely, there had to be something else. Besides being more vulnerable while he slept, there had to be another reason L avoided doing so, so often, right? Light waited for what seemed to be hours (however the clock only read a 10 minute difference), noting L hadn’t moved once. </p><p><i>Well, that was a bummer,</i> the teen thought to himself, all of the built up anticipation lost on that single moment. However, he didn’t know what he was expecting to begin with. It was just like L to intentionally stall to pester him in private. </p><p>He’d finally resigned himself to shutting his eyes and trying to rest, when the bed shifted and he heard a mumbled “Oh, right,” from the other side of the mattress. </p><p>He watched the lithe man slide off of the side of the bed in an amphibious manner, and reach underneath it, producing a large, plain white box in between both of his palms. </p><p>Light squinted his eyes, hoping that he was seeing things incorrectly. <i>That better not be a fucking cake.</i> He watched the detective bite his thumb intently, then reach for a corner of the lid. <i>I’ll wring his neck if it is.</i></p><p>L fumbled with the box, turning it over in his hands, as apparently, pulling on the corner of the lid hadn’t worked. He flipped it on the side, seeming to analyze the device from another angle, as if that’d help, then slid his thumbnail along the opening on the side, seemingly trying to procure a graspable opening. </p><p>Light had fully turned on his side by now, figuring the ruckus was a good enough excuse for him to be awake and watching Ryuuzaki. He watched the detective flip the box over once more, then again, in attempt to find in opening, when he finally found himself fed up and frustrated with both the noisiness of the situation and the fact that his satiation of his curiosity was in that box, and L was taking ages to open it. “Here, just give me—”</p><p><i>Pop.</i> “There we go.” The older of the two said with a smirk, leading Light to wonder if the entire display had been a ruse acted out intentionally. That concern was pushed aside when L reached into the box, pulling out a large, plush object. <i>At least it isn’t food.</i> Upon closer inspection, Light recognized it to be...</p><p>
  <i>A chair cushion?</i>
</p><p>“Ryuuzaki, what’s that for?”</p><p>Instead of responding verbally, L casually tossed the pillow his head was resting upon onto the dresser, placing the navy blue cushion in the place it once was. “Matter of preference,” he finally replied, simply. </p><p>“You prefer that over a regular pillow? Isn’t that rougher on your neck?”</p><p>“That isn’t a major concern of mine, Light-kun. In fact, I hadn’t even considered it until you mentioned it.”</p><p>“So, why use that instead of a pillow? Is it because it reminds you of being in a chair?” He asked, satirically. </p><p>“Yes, that is the exact reason. I ordered it with those intentions in mind.” The other replied, his tone conveying he was nothing but serious. </p><p>Light opened his mouth a few times, but found it was becoming increasingly difficult to formulate words. “...How?” was all he finally managed, before resigning, his sleep clouded mind be damned.</p><p>“I contacted the company who manufactures my favorite chairs and asked them if they’d send me a cushion by itself. The man on the phone was a bit taken aback and informed me that if one of my old chair cushions was destroyed, then the warranty stated I would be eligible for an entirely new chair with a fifty percent discount in place. However, I informed him that I wasn’t interested, and solely wanted the cushion. It was very simple once he understood what I meant, really, though it did take a bit more of explaining.” </p><p>“No. What? No. I was asking something more along the lines of how, or why that’d be the exact reason you have it.”</p><p>“Oh. Well, in that case, for the most part, I have almost always preferred sleeping in chairs, or at least while sitting. It has always felt better that way, in my opinion, however, it would be very difficult to explain.”</p><p>Light huffed. “Then why not sleep in an actual chair? Or just sit up and sleep?” he questioned, only semi-ironically.</p><p>“I have a tendency to fall over when I sleep for a long period of time while sitting upright. While it doesn’t disturb me, I imagine it would certainly disturb Light-kun if he were to hear a loud disruption in the middle of the might, and especially if the cause of the noise were to land upon him.”</p><p><i>’While it doesn’t disturb me’...okay.</i> Light briefly wondered why he ever cared to know more about Ryuuzaki’s oddities in the first place. He considered that the couch cushion versus the regular pillow was some sort of metaphor about how different Ryuuzaki was compared to everyone else, yet how acceptable, and even palatable he truly seemed when you knew him, but then dismissed that as his exhausted mind speaking nonsense. “I guess you’re right about that,” he shrugged. </p><p>L hummed in response and turned over, his back facing Light once more. “Mmm. Goodnight again, Light-kun.”</p><p>“Yeah. Goodnight.”</p><p>Light watched L writhe around in attempt to get comfortable, and felt relatively touched in regards to the fact that the man was altering his usual sleeping arrangements to better accommodate Light’s own. However, said feeling was quickly washed away when he reminded himself that L was he reason he was here in the first place. Not that he (entirely) blamed the man for coming to the conclusions that he had. He’d likely believe the same, had he been in Ryuuzaki’s position, but he imagined that he’d be at least a bit more understanding than him. </p><p>Soon after the rustling had stopped, and the mattress was at last free of movement, Light felt his eyes flutter shut, breaths deepening and mind finally beginning to relax. He was so close, on the precipice of entirely letting go, when—</p><p>Creak. </p><p>
  <i>Dip.</i>
</p><p>Creak. </p><p><i>Here we go.</i> This was what L was attempting to hide from him, the couch cushion was likely just a ploy to divert his attention from what he was <i>really</i> attempting to hide. Ryuuzaki presumably believed him to be asleep, and would finally expose whatever it was it was he was trying to conceal to Light in full blossom, and he’d be able to mock the eccentric, supposedly world renowned detective for it for weeks upon end, and—</p><p>The mattress dipped beside him, and all background rumination ceased, instantly placed upon the back burner. Opening his eyes, he was met with a seemingly asleep L, who was now facing him. <i>Oh. Maybe not. I guess he moves in his sleep.</i> Whatever, that shouldn’t be horrible, unless he did so constantly. Light shrugged it off and shut his eyes once more. </p><p>He was on the cliff, the precipice of unconscious bliss once more, ready to wipe away the events of the day for the next 8 hours in a land of nothingness, when a foreign warmth suddenly pressed itself flush against his chest. <i>What the hell?</i></p><p>He opened his eyes to see wild, ebony strands of hair nestled plentifully against under his chin, against his neck—similar to when the same oddity had lunged itself at him. His first instinct was to push him away, to shove at him roughly, until he felt light, steady breaths against the crook of his neck. </p><p>
  <i>Is he...actually sleeping?</i>
</p><p>No, this was likely another test of sorts. Unlike the first time that Ryuuzaki had successfully lunged at him, he had stopped his next and only two other attempts, having remained tightly on guard since the initial incident. However, Light had an inkling of suspicion that the man had gotten some sort of satisfaction out of his flustered appearance when he did so.</p><p>So...was this Ryuuzaki’s way of amping up his experiments?</p><p>Probably. </p><p>However, the soft, rhythmic exhales against his collarbone, and the type of common sense that came from his sleep muddled mind said otherwise. </p><p>Light wanted nothing more than to force the lithe man away from him and get back to the domain of almost-sleep nirvana he had previously been so, so close to reaching, but the lack of knowledge as to whether the detective was truly asleep or not kept him from doing so. </p><p>Realistically, he shouldn’t even care, and should just push him away either way—really, he doubted L would allow him the same freedoms. However, the known fact that he hadn’t slept in at least a week made him consider otherwise...</p><p>L’s breaths remained steady, not a change of pace in earshot. Light sighed. Fine, he’d let him stay where he was for the time being, while simultaneously trying to get back to sleep himself. Plus, it didn’t hurt that the warmth of Ryuuzaki’s body was comfortable and snug, helping to keep himself warm all the while...</p><p>Upon the mental recital of the word ‘warm’, his eyes fluttered open, remembering the the detective was only underneath the thin, main blanket and not his personal one—which they each had one of, in the event that one of them ‘happened to steal the blankets away in the middle of the night’, so L himself had said upon their first night of rooming together. </p><p>Sighing, Light reached around the curled body and dug out the blanket from where it lay trapped under that forsaken, garish couch cushion, and draped it over the older’s body, rolling his eyes at the hassle of it all as he did so. <i>Idiot</i>, he thought, not knowing if he was referring to himself or the presumably unconscious man against his chest. <i>Possibly both.</i></p><p>Once he’d settled both himself and the other he shut his eyes once more more than prepared to fall back into the tranquil abyss of relaxation. The man’s ebony locks tickled his chin, and rather than being annoyed, as he usually would, he pressed his chin softly into it, enjoying the silkiness that now lined his skin. <i>It’s alright, just this once,</i> he told himself. <i>He initiated it, after all.</i></p><p>Once he finally found himself drifting off once more, at last as content with the situation as he could convince himself to be, a sudden noise, paired with the vibration resulting from said noise steadily rumbling against his chest, disturbed him from his almost-bliss <i>again.</i></p><p>“Thank you, Light-kun.”</p><p>
  <i>I knew it.</i>
</p><p>---</p><p>3.</p><p><i>Finally</i>, Light thought. <i>A lead. I got a lead, and we’re going to catch Kira.</i></p><p>His initial excitement at his accomplishment was overridden by a strong determination to finish what he’d unwillingly been dragged into, to fix everything possible that had gone wrong since the murderer had emerged—after he showed L, of course.</p><p>“Ryuuzaki?” he called, looking over to the man who was currently twirling in his chair as far as the chain would allow him, then unwrapping himself once it became too taut—needless to say, uninterested in all Kira-related ventures. “I know you’re not into this, but why don’t you come over here and check this out for a second?”</p><p>The detective perked up only slightly, tilting his head like a cat who was only halfway interested, but not engaged enough to care, yet still slid his chair over to the younger, peering at the computer screen which he was gesturing to. </p><p>“Look,” he said. “What do you make of this?”</p><p>L’s eyes widened, taking in the information before him, as Light explained the process he went through to come to said conclusions. </p><p>“Yagami-kun...this is amazing research,” the man says, finger to his lips, seemingly astonished. </p><p>“Thanks,” Light replies nonchalantly, and although he’s accustomed to people complimenting him quite often—it’s simply a part of life, at this point. If people stopped complimenting him, he’d wonder if he was doing something wrong. However, those were meaningless, and all paled in comparison to hearing one spill from L’s lips, seemingly without caution. Although he’d done similar before, and he knew he was capable of such a feat, this didn’t seem like an attempt to rile him up, a way to compare his abilities and genius to that of the mass murderer they were focusing on catching. Instead, this appears to actually be real, authentic, genuine, and it makes his heart soar in his chest. </p><p>L makes a few more comments about the research, to which Light responds, until, “So, that means...”</p><p>“Yeah.” Light pauses, eyes raking over the man’s close to emotionless face, knowing exactly what he’s thinking. “Kira can kill in ways other than heart attacks!”</p><p>Although he had already likely came to the same conclusion while reading over Light’s data, L’s mouth gapes open further in surprise, and the members of the task force who are present behind the pair buzz with words filled with a mixture of surprise and relief at the discovery. L barks ideas at them, some alluding to the fact that he’s entirely sure that Kira isn’t for hire, as it isn’t possible that a company located Kira before he did. </p><p>They exchange more words, until Light’s father and Mogi return, Matsuda happily informing them of the news. The chief beams at the idea, saying that both his Matsuda and his son did a spectacular job. </p><p>“Yes,” L says, placing a firm hand on Light’s shoulder. “Amazing job, Light-kun.” Though repeated, the sentiment is received the same, if not doubled. Light allows a small, almost undetectable smile to grace his face at the praise. Ryuuzaki adjusts the position of the hand on the youth’s shoulder, and Light assumes he’s simply using his arm as a means of keeping his balance, as the man’s feet are hanging more than halfway over the edge of the seat of his chair. However, in that moment, L squeezes his shoulder warmly, and it sparks something within his chest. “Really, Light-kun. If you keep this up, it’d be beneficial for us to work alongside each other again, someday.”</p><p>L releases his grip on the shoulder and rolls back to his side of the desk, in front of his computer, typing speedily away onto the keyboard. Light notices his father and a few other members of the task force congratulating him for his accomplishment, and hears himself reply something of a grateful ‘thank you’ in response, but the praises are empty and meaningless in comparison to what he’s heard only moments prior. </p><p><i>Did he really mean it?</i> Sure, Ryuuzaki was politely rude, intentionally vexing, and all but eccentric, but he was clever, he was keen. More so than anyone the teen had ever met, discounting himself, of course. Light couldn’t deny that he admired this about him. </p><p>His pride swelled, the feeling of success of finally getting a general location of the killer they’d been hunting for months overcome by that of the one that came with L’s offer, his commendation. </p><p>Nothing meant as much as that. </p><p>---</p><p>4.</p><p>It had all occurred in a blur. The emergency signal from Matsuda’s belt, coming from the Yotsuba main offices, the call to Misa confirming that the halfwitted officer had simply wandered off, and the call to Matsuda’s personal cell, in which they were informed that he was indeed in danger and couldn’t move freely. All of the following orchestrated events fell into sequence, and after changing into paramedic uniforms that Ryuuzaki had on hand for unknown reasons, as well as an ambulance he also had stored in the underground parking floor, they’d arrived at the ‘scene’, sirens blaring, and wheeled the ‘dead’ Matsuda-Aiber into the back of the vehicle. </p><p>L bit his finger as he stared at the ceiling of the van, looking as if he were just now contemplating the events that he’d very much himself planned out. “I do not typically like to arrive at the scene myself,” he started, “but since we are short staffed, it seems we had no choice.” He sighed. “Matsuda, you idiot.”</p><p>The rest of the ride back to the tower was silent, save the sound of the sirens until they were conveniently shut off a few blocks away from their destination. Aiber made a few half-witted comments, which were well received by Light, but procured no response from L. Not that the detective disapproved, but he seemed as if he were staring into space, not at all privy to the fact they were speaking at all. Light wondered how much of that was true. </p><p>Now, after a quick, silent, shower, they found themselves beside each other in bed—Light laying on his back, and L in his typical crouch, hunched over, hand to his mouth. </p><p>
  <i>Something is bothering him.</i>
</p><p>“You aren’t going to rest?”</p><p>The detective turned his head slowly, only half looking at the younger man beside him. </p><p>“No. I don’t see any point in doing so, when there are still many potential variables to consider. As for sleeping, you know I am not due to sleep for another day or so.”</p><p>“I thought you might be tired after today’s events. After all, that isn’t something you’re accustomed to doing. Or, maybe, you’d at least want to rest your mind.”</p><p>“There is no need, Light-kun,” he replied, looking thoughtfully at the blanket skirting against the edges of his toes. “Besides,” he added, quieter. “I am not sure I could if I wanted to.”</p><p>Light paused, analyzing the man’s sudden admittance, and his tone in doing so. “Adrenaline?” he questioned. </p><p>“Something of the sort.”</p><p>Light shifted onto his side, facing his bedmate, and lifted the large, main blanket up, inviting the other in. “Come here.”</p><p>“I thought I told you that I wasn’t interested in sleeping or relaxing tonight, Light-kun.”</p><p>“I know. You don’t have to stay all night, just for a little while. It’ll calm your nerves, and you can go back to sitting there. Or you can think for a while, over here. Whatever suits you. Just let yourself calm down a bit.” He looked over to L, to see him staring at the empty space under the cover, almost as if calculating the percentage of how beneficial doing so could be, and whether he should actually do so or not. “Plus, it’s cold in here. You know you’d prefer to.”</p><p>“Hmph.” The older of the two seemed to consider his options for a few moments longer, then laid down beside Light, curling up into his usual hunched position. </p><p>The younger released the cover atop him, watching it swallow the lanky body up, almost wholly, as he did. “That’s all? You aren’t going to come closer?” He said, a slight teasing edge to his voice. L merely chewed his thumb in response. “You do this once a week. Shying up now?” Yes, after their first incident, L had continued to do so weekly, every time he slept. Light never said anything in response, simply letting the man do what he wanted. If it was a reaction he was seeking, then he wouldn’t receive one at all. Back to the present, he laughed softly, trying to ease the tension of situation. </p><p>“Fine.” L shifted closer, adjusting himself to the warmth radiating off of Light in comforting waves, and then, a moment later, rested his head tentatively against the younger’s chest. He sighed once more, attempting to unwind. </p><p>“There,” Light said, allowing the older to get comfortable where he lay. After he was settled down, he reached forward, brushing the hair from the man’s neck away, and pressing his two first fingers against the area, finding his pulse. “Relax,” he said preemptively, in case he were to react unfavorably.  “I’m just checking your heartbeat.” </p><p>The former’s heart was racing, skyrocketing past Light’s own. <i>Even though he’d orchestrated the entire thing, putting himself out there must have made him nervous. Something about being out of his element, being vulnerable.</i> He waited for a few minutes, but the thumping seemingly refused to slow. </p><p>“Shhh,” he said, in a manner that he hoped would be comforting, although it did come from the main (and only) suspect for the first Kira in the mass murder case. He wouldn’t typically do this, but for some reason, the idea of L’s discomfort also made Light feel something viably similar. Lifting the light pressure he had on the man’s pulse, he reached around the back of his neck, and rubbed the pad of his thumb in circles against the nape of his neck, gradually allowing the rest of his fingers to join in. </p><p>L looked up questioningly from his place against the youth’s chest, appearing to be confused. “Light?” he asked, as though nothing else needed to be said as to determine what he meant. </p><p>“Just getting you to relax,” he said, his voice hushed, as his fingers continued their ministrations. “Close your eyes if you need to.”</p><p>L exhaled, and dropped his head back down once more, eyes shutting slowly, though Light noted he was a bit reluctant to do so. “You can go back whenever you want to. Just take it easy for now,” he assured. </p><p>He felt the older man’s heavy exhale, like a sigh against his chest, and shut his own eyes, though his fingers never stilled in their motions. Only when he reached forward and allowed himself to feel the man’s pulse, noting that it’d slowed considerably, did he allow himself to begin to drift off. </p><p>L lay, mind reeling, yet more at ease. He wouldn’t sleep, but it was cold, after all, and he’d allow himself to relax for a bit longer. He supposed that couldn’t do much harm, if any. </p><p>---</p><p>5.</p><p>They’d been working on the Kira case day in and day out as of late, and Misa had agreed to interview with Yostuba Corp in a matter of days. </p><p>They were sitting at their computers after everyone else had left for the evening, conjuring up, then listing possible things Aiber would ask Misa while posing as Eraldo Coil. </p><p>In secret, though he was mildly convinced it showed, Light was enthused that L was finally showing interest in the case again. Although <i>some</i> others on the task force found him to be more bossy, and henceforth more unbearable, yet Light preferred him this way. In his opinion, it did the man well to see him in charge, order everything around, in his cunning manner, and most of all, become himself again. Almost as if it were natural, as it should have always been. </p><p>“Hey, Ryuuzaki,” he began, “do you think it’d be a good idea for us to have Aiber ask if—”</p><p>He turned his neck to the side, only to find the the detective hunched nearly onto the desk beside him, neck and shoulders slouched forward, motionless. The sight all but startled him, as he wasn’t prepared for to see it, and a few very disturbing scenarios about what may have occurred crossed his mind (especially considering the specific case they were investigating), but as soon as he saw the man’s back rise a bit as he inhaled, he let out a sigh of relief, his body instantly ridding itself of the tension that had come as a result of the discovery. </p><p>“You won’t wake up for at least 16 hours, will you,” he muttered more to himself than anyone. L had apparently fallen asleep a day before he typically did during the week; it was likely due to the fact that the case was picking up and he was <i>actually</i> working again. He also knew for a fact that when the insomniac fell asleep after staying awake for that long, allotted amount of time, he wouldn’t wake for the next 16 hour period, at least, regardless of what happened to him. He could be prodded at, kicked, anchored like a puppet, and completely fall onto the floor, face first, and he still wouldn’t budge. Light knew a few of these from personal experience. </p><p>He’d scheduled his sleep to occur during the weekends, and spill into Sunday morning, which the task force was all aware of. They’d still arrive at work at the same time, but would work solely amongst themselves until L awoke. Light would work beside him in bed until he did so, communicating with the task force via computer IMs or text messages if needed. </p><p>Light sighed, bringing himself back to the present. He could leave Ryuuzaki here in his chair for the next 16 or so hours, but that mean he’d be forced to stay beside him, due to the cuffs that locked them together. Mind reeling over the two options, he quickly came to a decision.</p><p>He stood and approached the sleeping insomniac, placing his hand on the back of his chair, then stuck his hand in the other’s pocket, withdrawing the keycard to their shared room, and clipping onto his own shirt pocket. </p><p>“I’m going to pick you up now,” he warned a bit unsurely, although he knew the other couldn’t hear him at all. Sliding an arm underneath the creases of Ryuuzaki’s legs where he remained in his standard crouch, and hooking one across his back, he pushed upward with his legs and lifted the man. </p><p>Making his way to the elevator, he silently cursed the man in his mind, annoyed by the prospect of having to carry the restless man to bed. <i>You should have just told me you were too tired to continue working. Now, look what you’ve done.</i> He huffed, only semi-irritated. </p><p>Once they reached the door, he snaked the hand supporting Ryuuzaki’s back further around it, grasping hold of the keycard and pulling it from his shirt pocket, where he then dipped his knees, lowering both himself and the stubborn detective to unlock the door. </p><p>After stepping into the room, he walked a bit faster, more than ready to set L down and be done with the night.</p><p>Laying the detective on the bed in his naturally curled state, careful to place his head on that godforsaken couch cushion, he lazily draped the blanket over the lower half of his body, then stared at the cuff. </p><p><i>Should I unchain us so I can change?</i> It would be simple, all he’d have to do was reach into Ryuuzaki’s pocket and unfasten them temporarily, change clothing, then refasten them as if nothing had ever happened. Yes, it’d be easy. Almost...</p><p><i>Too</i> easy? He put his line of thought on hold. </p><p>Is this another test?</p><p>He could easily see this as something Ryuuzaki would do to test his loyalty while having the opportunity to unchain himself, giving himself (limited) freedom. </p><p>However, that didn’t attest for the fact that the cameras were still in place, carefully watching his every move. He also didn’t know if Watari was still awake or not. If so, he’d have his eyes glued to the live footage. So, he wasn’t really free. </p><p>Would L set something like this up, to catch him in the act? Yes. Would he believe that Light acting on his newfound ‘freedom’, although limited, would make him more likely to be Kira? Certainly. So...</p><p>Screw it. Regardless if he were currently being tested or not, he wanted to go to bed <i>comfortably</i>, which meant not sleeping in khakis. If L had a problem with that, then, whatever. He wasn’t actually doing anything wrong, regardless of how the detective spun the narrative. The task force would side with him over Ryuuzaki, anyway. </p><p>Reaching back into the unconscious man’s pocket and digging around for a few moments before finally producing a key, he unlocked his cuff and set it down, making his way over to the drawers and changing into his much more comfortable sleeping attire. When he was done, he snapped the metal circle around his wrist once more, and slid the key back into the pocket from which it came. </p><p><i>Well.</i> Ryuuzaki was going to have to sleep in his typical jeans and shirt getup. Not that it was much different than what he wore when he <i>actually</i> slept, anyway. </p><p>Before walking over to his side of the bed, he noticed that one of L’s hands were still trapped under his curled up legs, so he inched it out, setting it free and leaving it atop the mattress by itself. </p><p>After he laid to sleep, he pulled the covers over both himself and Ryuuzaki, then turned his back to the him, allowing himself to drift off. </p><p>In the morning, he awoke to a still unconscious L, which he fully expected. Sitting up and clearing the sleep from his eyes, he relaxed in thought for a few moments. </p><p>Against his will, Misa would infiltrate Yotsuba Corp through an interview, and thus help them discover which of the now seven members Kira was. She’d be in danger, but...</p><p>But nothing. Ryuuzaki wouldn’t let up on the idea, and it didn’t seem as if there were many other options, anyway. Although he wasn’t all too fond of the squeaky model, he didn’t wish for any harm to befall her. It could also especially compromise their investigation if it did, if they got her to speak, which, however, he doubted she would, making her all the more vulnerable and disposable. </p><p>He sighed. L knew what he was doing, and though he wasn’t fond of the idea, he’d simply have to trust the man this time around. He didn’t willingly let Matsuda die, so he doubted he would easily let similar happen to Misa, especially since she was the main and only suspect for the second Kira, and he was unsure how Kira killed yet. </p><p>After pondering upon their current situation for what he figured was an adequate amount of time, he pulled his laptop from where it lay atop the nightstand and began working on the case for the day. </p><p>A few minutes later, exactly on the hour, Watari entered their room, pushing a large wheeled cart filled with far more than enough sugar riddled choices to satisfy Ryuuzaki’s sweet tooth whenever he awoke. The first time it had occurred, Light had been astonished, but more confused than anything, until Watari politely explained that L liked to have his pick of the litter, so to speak, and would be a bit grumpy, and definitely more disagreeable for the better half of the day if he didn’t. At the time, Light simply nodded his head, but at this point he didn’t want to risk experiencing that, so he simply smiled at the elderly man when he came into full view. </p><p>The man parked the cart beside L’s side of the bed, returning Light’s smile once he got close enough. Reaching toward one of the bottom compartments, he pulled out an entirely different, much more normal and socially acceptable plate of breakfast food on a collapsable tray, and handed it to Light, who took it from his hands, smiling and nodding in thankfulness. This had become weekly procedure on the days that Ryuuzaki actually slept. </p><p>Watari exited the room after bowing graciously, leaving Light to set his laptop aside and eat. Upon finishing, he set the tray to the side, and grabbed his laptop to work again, catching a glimpse of Ryuuzaki’s sleeping form as he did so. </p><p>The man was completely still, entirely limp, as if his body had molded itself to the bed he was laying on—looking as if he were a statue, if it weren’t for the oddly comforting rising and falling motions of his chest, and the occasional, barely there, twitches of his fingers. </p><p>Unexpectedly, a sudden aura of domesticity settled itself over Light, and seemingly the entire room in turn. Though the arrangement was quite strange—him being chained to the man who was still technically investigating him, and who was also sound asleep beside him in bed—everything felt <i>comfortable</i>, it felt <i>right</i> almost as everything he’d done in his life had purposely culminated to make this moment possible. </p><p>It sounded stupid, in essence, but for some reason, it was badgering his conscience. The feeling instantly brought him back to what L had said regarding them working together in the future. Was it possible? Had that been a genuine statement? He certainly hoped so. It had felt genuine when he’d said it, but he had no real way of verifying it, especially since L was such a skilled liar. </p><p>He knew things wouldn’t remain entirely the same, but that was okay, and he didn’t expect it to. He probably preferred it otherwise; their shared room was just proof that L didn’t trust him as much as he should. In the future, if they really did work together, they’d certainly have separate rooms. Neither of them enjoyed being chained together. </p><p>Light decided to stop himself while he was ahead. L was known for his tests and tricks, and getting his hopes up was very far down on his list of priorities. Sighing, he reached for his laptop and continued working. </p><p>Hours later, L finally awoke while Light was drafting a text to Mogi, so that he, as her new ‘manager’, would ensure that she was ready for their visit down to practice her interview lines later. This was much less complex than directly contacting the overzealous girl himself, he figured. </p><p>L’s eyes were curled into fists as he pawed at his eyes, seemingly without a set motion in mind, resembling that of a feline as he did so. “Good morning, sleepyhead,” Light mocked playfully, a small smirk toying at his mouth as he watched his freshly awakened companion’s actions. The man only grunted in response as he sat upward, grabbing that damn couch cushion-pillow hybrid and resting it upon the headboard of the bed as he did every time he awoke, causing Light to laugh under his breath. </p><p>Quickly, the man’s eyes scanned the tray before him, almost as if a predator cautiously watching over the area for the most vulnerable and worthy prey. Today, those seemed to be the cookies, which he ravenously shoved into his mouth, crumbs spilling upon the tray as he did so. </p><p>Toward the beginning of the case, Light would have found this repulsive and ill-mannered. Now, he easily accepted it as just another of Ryuuzaki’s quirks, something he had to get used to when dealing with the man. </p><p>After he’d finished wordlessly munching on his victims of the morning hunt, he wiped his mouth halfheartedly and turned to Light, watching him type on his laptop keyboard. “What time is it?” he questioned. </p><p>“2 in the afternoon, almost 3.”</p><p>L nodded, then looked at Light’s clothing, seemingly for the first time that morning, then his own. Light noticed the moment the realization clicked in his mind. “Did Watari unlock the cuffs last night?”</p><p>“No,” Light replied, shaking his head briefly, before returning to his work related activities on the laptop. “I did.”</p><p>L appeared to consider this for a second, mulling over who knew exactly what, then nodded in what he guessed was acceptance. The man scooted closer across the bed, peering at Light’s screen. “Are these your ideas for questions Misa should be asked during the interview?”</p><p>Light nodded, and also inched a bit closer to the other, sliding his screen closer to L so he could read them easier. “Yeah, I copied down the ones you mentioned last night onto here, so we could just have one comprehensive document, if that’s alright.”</p><p>“Yes, good idea,” the other affirmed, stretching out his words a bit as he gnawed on his thumb, eyes raking over the contents of the screen. As he read, he settled himself more comfortably. “Do you have the file version of the email Yotsuba sent to Mogi on this computer?” he asked, once his eyes reached the bottom of the page. </p><p>“Yeah, I emailed it to myself last night. One second,” Light replied, moving to close the document tab he had opened. “Internet’s a bit slower than usual. Give it a minute.” A few elongated moments after, he felt a sudden weight crash into his shoulder, nearly causing him to jump. </p><p>He looked down to see a mass of dark, silky locks painting the arm and partial chest area of his nightshirt. The splayed locks began to gather as one, the weight beginning to shift in tandem with it. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” came a voice from around the same area, as the weight almost lifted off of his shoulder entirely. </p><p>“No, it’s alright,” he replied. He understood. Quite frankly, he didn’t understand how L stayed up for practically a week at a time. It was a surprise that occurrences like this didn’t happen more often. </p><p>“Huh,” the other, whose eyes were now visible to Light, breathed out. His gaze shifted from the teen’s shoulder to the laptop screen, as if calculating something. When he’d apparently reached his decision, he rested his head back upon the same shoulder, a thumb prying at his lips as he waited for the file to load. </p><p><i>That’s new,</i> Light mused, but didn’t really think twice about it. It wasn’t as intimate as literally laying beside him as closely as he could muster, so he figured this was in the realm of acceptability. </p><p>“Should be just a moment now,” he reassured, subconsciously wondering why the speed of the internet was comparable to molasses this morning. </p><p>“Hm,” the other replied, and Light swore he could feel him blink against his shoulder blade. </p><p>After a few moments of both the internet failing to load the requested materials in a timely manner, and complete and utter silence, Light finally decided to break the stillness and bring up something that’d been on his mind. Now was as good of a time as any, especially since they were alone. He swallowed his pride, and spoke aloud. </p><p>“Did you really mean it?” he asked. </p><p>“Hmm?” the other seemed to ask from his position against him. </p><p>“When you said you think it’d be beneficial for us to work together in the future. You know, after all this Kira business is wrapped up. Did you mean it?”</p><p>“Hmmmm.”</p><p>“I’m not sure how obvious it is, but I’m very in favor of the idea. I’m sure you’ve already deduced this or whatever, but prior to meeting you, and being brought onto this case, almost everything was boring. I’ve always been at the top of my class, which I’m sure you know; excelling at my studies has always come naturally to me. And I know you’re not really into that sort of thing, at least from what I can see, and I’m sure you know this, too, but I’ve never struggled socially, either. It might seem like I’m bragging, but I swear that I’m not. Nothing was challenging, and everyone was too easy. Everyday was so...monotonous, and now it isn’t. I’m not saying the existence of Kira is a good thing—I’m definitely not; you’d have me hung if I did—but, what I <i>will</i> say is that I’m grateful to have this opportunity to work on a case like this, to work with <i>you</i>. No one else has challenged me, or kept me on my toes, like you have. I know we fight sometimes, but I guess that’s to be expected when two people like us are forced to be together for such longer periods of time. When we aren’t, we collaborate very well, and the results are worthwhile. Basically, what I’m saying is that although it’s unfortunate that Kira is still out there on a rampage, I’m pleased with the notion of being allowed to work alongside you, and I don’t want it to stop here.” He swallowed. “If you were serious about the offer, of course.”</p><p>He waited for a few moments, then was met with absolute silence. Worrying his lip with his front teeth nervously, he realized that he was actually <i>nervous</i>, and cursed himself for being so, and for the reason why. There he had just said the most truthful, revealing, unfiltered thing he had in his entire life, and the man it was directed at wasn’t saying a thing. Probably testing him to see how long he snapped, internally reveling in what had to be his very blatant discomfort, or something. <i>He was just laying there, against him, as if he couldn’t hear him, mocking his confession as he did so, using him as a crutch which was likely another one of those stupid tests he constantly subjected him to and the</i> damn <i>file still hadn’t loaded—</i></p><p>His train of thought was derailed when he heard an audible exhale come from the direction of his chest. “Ryuuzaki?” he asked, throwing away his previous line of thinking. Maybe he <i>was</i> about to give him a response. Light craned his neck downward, turning his body to get a better glimpse of the man’s face, when—</p><p>Oh. <i>Of course he fell asleep when I asked that.</i></p><p>Light released a deep breath that he hadn’t realized he’d been holding, unsure if he was more relieved at his current ‘failure’ than he would have been if L had actually said yes. It did him no good to delve deeper into the subject, so he quickly avoided doing so. </p><p>He sighed once more. Well, back to the Ryuuzaki predicament. Should he lay him down on the bed? No, if he awoke, which he was at risk for this time around since he’d already slept for his standard 16 hour window, he’d probably be incredibly cranky if he <i>did</i> accidentally get disturbed into waking up, so that was out of the cards. </p><p>Light rolled his eyes and slowly raised his arm over and behind the sleeping insomniac, grabbing his personal blanket and draping it over the crouched figure that still laid against his collarbone. <i>Maybe I’ll ask you another time. Maybe I won’t. Regardless, it doesn’t matter right now. The Kira case is of upmost importance, and everything else comes second.</i></p><p>He glanced at the detective to ensure he was still actually sleeping, and this wasn’t some weird, perverse prank that he was getting pleasure seeing Light mentally writhe from. The former, at least, was currently true. </p><p>
  <i>It’s probably just best to let everything play out naturally.</i>
</p><p>Lifting his arm back over Ryuuzaki, careful not to wake him, he straightened himself out as much as he could without disturbing the other. Positioning his fingers back above the keyboard, where they naturally hovered, he instantly caught glance of the screen. </p><p>The file had loaded. </p><p>
  <i>Of course.</i>
</p><p>---</p><p>+1</p><p>Tomorrow was the ‘big day’. </p><p>Or, that was what Matsuda had referred to it as, anyway. </p><p>Tomorrow, said man would appear on television—Sakura TV, to be exact—and retell his story of how he discovered that the Yotsuba Corporation was using the power of Kira to support their own selfish, capitalistic goals, and what was even more surprising—he knew exactly who currently possessed the power, through his own personal investigation of the company—which wasn’t entirely false. </p><p>From there, the rest of their plan would fall into place—Namikawa would phone Higuchi and tell him to tune in to the program, informing him of the ‘direness’ of it, which would cause Higuchi to leap into action. </p><p>He would try to contact Misa, who he believed was the Second Kira, and when she didn’t pick up, he’d head to Misa’s agency himself, to attempt to find Matsuda’s real (albeit fake) name on file, from when he’d been her manager. </p><p>When that occurred, he’d try to kill Matsuda using the fake name, and they’d have all the proof they needed to arrest him and convict him as Kira, more than likely leading to his execution. There were other precautions set in place, in case everything didn’t go exactly to plan, Higuchi being the card that he was, but as of now, their plan was solid, and when Kira would be brought to justice, Light would finally be able to clear his name. </p><p>So, when he exited the bathroom, hair still partially damp, and a towel adorning his neck, it was needless to say that he was surprised to see L sitting at the foot of their shared bed, back more hunched than usual, and...wearing the same disconnected expression he wore, back when he’d claimed to be depressed?</p><p>“Ryuuzaki?” he asked, as he approached the man, standing beside him. “What’s wrong?”</p><p>“Hm?” he replied, as if he’d just been disturbed from a stupor, and only halfhearted listening to what the other had asked. “Oh. Nothing in particular. I’m just thinking over all of the details of the case.”</p><p>“Ryuuzaki,” he attempted, trying his hand at reassurance. “There’s nothing to worry about. Higuchi is more than predictable, you said so yourself. Don’t worry, everything is going to go exactly as planned.”</p><p>“That wasn’t what I was referring to, in specific.”</p><p>“Oh?” Light raised an eyebrow. “What, then?”</p><p>“I think you know, Light.” He turned to face him, widened, yet almost...defeated (?) eyes meeting his own. “You’ll get upset if I mention it directly, as you have plenty of times in the past. But, being as clever as you are, I’m sure you can figure it out, Yagami-kun.” </p><p>Refusing to break his stare, apparently, he didn’t allow his eyes to shift, practically boring holes through Light’s skull, and following, his brain. <i>I know it’s impossible,</i> he considered, <i>but if anyone could read minds, it would be him.</i></p><p>“Think, Yagami-kun,” L provided. “It relates somewhat to the events of tomorrow, after Higuchi is arrested, and thereby confined.”</p><p>
  <i>After Higuchi is arrested, and then confined? Well, he’d eventually be executed. However, that wasn’t what Ryuuzaki’s words had focused upon, his enunciation was mostly on the ‘confined’ part of the statement. What exactly did he mean by that?</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Confined, confinement...oh. Ryuuzaki had claimed that not long after Misa had been locked up by his hand, that her attitude had did a 180 degree flip, claiming to not know anything about Kira—except for her wholehearted support for his mission—and was referring to L as a pervert, rather than someone who was performing a police interrogation upon her, when it had been clear that she knew she was being interrogated prior to.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Later, he’d claimed that Light himself had behaved in a similar manner, his personality shifting after a certain amount of time in the cell—which no one else supported, or rather, blamed it on the fact that he was so young, and had been confined for such an amount of time. ‘Anyone’s attitude would change,’ Aizawa had said.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>That meant Ryuuzaki was still banking off of his theory that somehow, once those that possessed Kira’s powers were unable to continue killing, aforementioned powers, along with the memories of them, were taken from suspect.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Ryuuzaki had implied that he still believed Light was the first Kira, and had engineered a way for his power and memories to be returned to him. That meant...</i>
</p><p>
  <i>He thinks that once we arrest Higuchi, I’m going to become Kira again.</i>
</p><p>Normally, he’d be offended, and act out, likely violently. He wasn’t a murderer, never had been, and certainly didn’t want to become one. And while he was still offended, majorly so, the dejected look on L’s face (which actually seemed authentic, though he couldn’t place much trust in that) caused him to rethink his reaction. </p><p>Exhaling deeply while he clenched, and unclenched his fists, he sat beside the man, the mattress dipping beneath his hips. “Ryuuzaki...you can’t actually believe that.” <i>He knew that he definitely could, and did.</i> “You know that isn’t true. Besides, I’m here, and I’m under your watch. What could possibly happen next?”</p><p>There was silence for a moment, until a response finally broke it. </p><p>“Light-kun knows what would happen next.”</p><p>“Ryuuzaki...” he began, but for once, couldn’t articulate the proper words that he wanted to say, that would best suit the situation. Telling him that he wasn’t Kira for the millionth time in the past few months was fruitless. How could he convince the man that was hellbent on proving him to be the greatest mass murderer in history, so much to the point that he held him in confinement for 53 days, then literally chained himself to him to keep a steady watch over him, that he didn’t want to kill him? That he didn’t want to see him die, or even harmed, for that matter—and actually hoped for the opposite—and wished to work with him in the future, long-term? “...”</p><p>Light was typically never one for entirely unnecessary physical contact. He’d known the basics of such in terms of human interaction, and then some. ‘Some’ being much, much more. He was a trickster, a conman of sorts, and his skills could rival that of Aiber’s, had he chosen a different career path, to (un)comfortably reside on the other side of justice. A man of well practiced communication, he was capable of convincing the vast majority of people to alter their very strongly grounded opinions at the drop of a hat, and could do so with an assuring, caring smile lining his face, and a soft pat on the other party’s back, as if to declare ‘Trust me, you’re making the right decision!’. And trust him, they always did. </p><p>A genius at maneuvering his path throughout social interactions, smoothly navigating his way seemingly genuine greetings and dismissals—he could have been an extremely successful salesman anywhere he chose to be employed, however at any rate, he’d view that as a waste of his beyond remarkable intellect, and maybe even a blow to his ego to simply consider. </p><p>Without further ado, he wasn’t fond of such formalities outside of public scenarios (and that of with his family, of course). When alone, he could revel in his distaste for the simplicity of other humans, and their lack of suspicion alike—the herd that could be convinced to sell their life savings at the quick flash of what they viewed to be a trustworthy, toothy smile from a very symmetrical face, and a thoughtful caress of the arm by a dexterous hand—without second thought. Granted, he made a habit to avoid abusing his abilities—since they were godlike, even, really, he would have made a perfect Kira—and only used them to put others at ease or behave using mannerisms one normally should in normal, daily occurrences. </p><p>Accordingly, he wasn’t very fond of unnecessary social graces when not faced with aforesaid circumstances, nor with extraneous physical contact alike, so when he reached out for Ryuuzaki, it was unlike him, however, L was unlike everyone else, in all of his mannerisms, behaviors, and superior intellect; he was unlike anyone that Light Yagami had ever encountered. His cleverness rivaled that of his own, his power definitely had surpassed such, and he wasn’t even remotely swayed by Light’s perfected comprehension of acceptable human relations, and even managed to see through them, as if they were nothing but transparent to him from the start. This amazed the teen, as he’d never in his life experienced anything similar. </p><p>Staring at the crushed, conquered face of the man against the light of the setting sun, whose rays were sneaking through the windows, as someone of his intellectual caliber and strength dipped his head in an imitation of defeat on the eve of their ‘victory’, he knew that he had to do <i>something.</i></p><p>Although adjacent to him, he pulled the man sideways into his chest, disregarding the unspoken rule that L initiated the odd notions of physical connection between the two, ignoring the large and believable possibility that everything similar L had done was a test of sorts. So what? To hell with that. Although L was calculating, constantly testing him in attempt to prove his theories correct, in this moment, Ryuuzaki was real, living and breathing, and he couldn’t allow him to look so unfittingly, yet realistically lifeless without doing anything, he wouldn’t. </p><p>“I’m not going to do that,” he reassured, as the man whose head lay against his chest didn’t react, but merely stared ahead at some nondescript point in the room before him. “I know you don’t believe me, but I promise, Ryuuzaki. I’d never betray you in that way, I swear. I couldn’t bring myself to do that.”</p><p>The man in his arms still said nothing, just staring ahead, hands still clasped tightly around his own ankles as he was held, almost as if he hardly took note of the fact that Light was even there. </p><p>“I’m not what you think I am. I could never...<i>be</i> something like that, it goes against everything I’ve ever stood for. Even if presented with the power, I would decline it.” </p><p>He breathed for a few beats, then proceeded. “I know it’s pointless to tell you to trust me, without having any way to prove my trustworthiness to you, and my simple word doesn’t stand very tall against your allegations, and the reasons for them, but...<i>I know</i> I’d never do something like that. Not to anyone, not to you.” <i>Especially not to you.</i></p><p>“Everyone else was so boring,” he continued his voice quieter. “Everyone, everything else was the same. You changed that, you know that?” He readjusted his arms around the man, resting his chin atop the crown of his head. “I—”</p><p>His head shot up instantly, his eyes widening almost beyond recognition from the surprise that it’d crossed his mind, and felt a twinge when he considered it, shocking him more than the fact that he’d almost recited it aloud. His breathing quickened, heart picking up a much speedier pace at the realization of what he’d almost said. </p><p>Holy <i>fuck.</i></p><p>No, that wasn’t true, it wasn’t true at all. It was a spur of the moment type of thing, caused by his inability to formulate of the proper words to say, and the strong desire to keep his <i>friend</i> (yes, he’d actually started to view Ryuuzaki as a friend, he also came to realize) from feeling as he did. </p><p>However, it would explain the fact that he enjoyed the other’s mere presence bountifully. The feelings of gratitude, the admiration, the fact that mostly all of the habits he found annoying were now endearing to him. </p><p>
  <i>Endearing?</i>
</p><p>No, that was way too far. He simply tolerated certain things, he didn’t bask in them. Not at all. He was just used to them, to him.</p><p>Yes, he was merely trying to assist his friend, who might not even see him as a friend in return. That’s all it was, and he got a bit too carried away in the acting portion of it. Helping his friend, his friend who thought he was going to begin plotting to kill him, starting tomorrow. </p><p><i>To</i> kill <i>him. His best friend, equal, the only person he found to be on his level, the first person he ever l—</i></p><p>No. His mind was playing tricks on him. God, he desperately needed to stray away from this train of thought, but the person of interest practically sitting in his lap didn’t help his cause one bit. </p><p>When he looked down, L was looking at him with wide, assuming eyes, almost if they could see through Light’s soul, if such a thing existed. <i>Of course he’d noticed.</i> There was no doubt that he hadn’t felt Light’s entire body, especially his arms, which were still locked around him, tense considerably, as well as both hear and feel his heartbeat and breath intake quickening all of a sudden, as his head had literally been propped against his chest. </p><p>“Yagami-kun?” he questioned curiously. </p><p>
  <i>Should he play stupid? No, then L would really think him to be guilty. He knew very well that Light wasn’t dumb, and knew exactly what he was referring to.</i>
</p><p>“Sorry, I just thought of something else. It isn’t related to you, or the case, don’t worry,” he partially lied. “It just came out of nowhere, that’s why it freaked me out for a second. Sorry about that.”</p><p>L looked at him with an expression that clearly said ‘I don’t believe you at all’, but averted his gaze instead of questioning him, like he typically would.</p><p>Light looked down, analyzing the man’s expression. <i>He doesn’t seem to be faking. Something really is off.</i> In that moment, he wondered when he got to be so skilled at reading the stoic, stone-faced man’s barely there expressions, but simply filed it away as one of those things that happen when you’re around the same person for such a long period of time. </p><p>Such as, when you’re literally chained to them at the wrist. </p><p>As he stared down, he noticed that a few drops of water from his still damp hair had made their way onto Ryuuzaki’s cheek while he’d been staring up at Light in accusation, almost a caricatured mockery of teardrops that were never given the chance to have fallen beneath the man’s eye. </p><p>Without thinking, he wiped the residue away, not really wanting that mental image in his conscience any longer. Although it was merely a passing image in his mind, something about it made him feel rigidly uncomfortable. </p><p>Almost as if sprung back to life by Light’s touch, the detective shifted his head back against the teen’s chest, his face obscured by his hair once more as he continued to stare into what Light interpreted as nothingness. Why L was still letting him hold him, he wasn’t aware. Maybe he was using him for warmth, or something. The room was quite cold. </p><p>Not understanding what was going on, which frustrated him to no avail, he simply tightened his grip on the man in his arms, also staring ahead, himself. <i>I won’t let anything happen to you, if I can do anything about it. I’m almost sure everything will go just as planned, but in case it doesn’t, I’ll do my best to protect you, if I can. Even if it’s in the future, if you allowed me to work with you, and we found ourselves in such a situation. I wouldn’t hesitate, because I l—</i> care <i>about you, since you’re my friend. That’s all, that’s normal.</i></p><p>
  <i>I won’t let you fall.</i>
</p><p>L said nothing further, simply continuing to gnaw on his finger and stare at the wall, as if in deep thought that it was impossible and far too late to retrieve him from.</p><p>---</p><p>Both his father and Matsuda had expressed concern for him, asking if he wanted to go home, or stay on their floor in the tower, respectively.</p><p>“Are you sure, Light?” His father had asked. “We’d all understand if you’d like to take a break and come home for tonight, or maybe for a few days, just to rest your mind. No one would berate you or think lesser of you because of it.”</p><p>“Yeah, Light-kun, the Chief is right,” Matsuda had agreed. “We won’t think differently about you if you need a few days off. We...understand.”</p><p>“No, really, it’s alright,” he’d replied. “I knew what I was getting into when I first joined the task force. I...think I’ll be alright, I promise.”</p><p>“Not to try to discourage you, Light-kun, but at the time you joined, you didn’t really know h—”</p><p>Soichiro cleared his throat and gave Matsuda a pointed look, almost as if warning him that he were treading on uncertain waters. </p><p>“R-right,” he cleared himself up. Silence ensued for a few moments before he spoke up again the tone of willing helpfulness still tinging his voice per usual. </p><p>“Well, Light-kun, if you change your mind, the offer to stay on my floor still stands.” </p><p>“Yes, Light, and the offer to come home still remains as well, anytime.”</p><p>“Thank you both, I really appreciate the offers, but I think I need the privacy for now. I’ll think it over for the next couple of days and I’ll let you know if anything changes.”</p><p>Soichiro nodded, laying a firm hand on his son’s shoulder, before turning around and leaving. </p><p>Matsuda lingered for a second longer, hands fumbling with themselves against his suit jacket. “Really, Light-kun, I meant what I said. If you need anything, I’m just a call away. And a few floors away, too.”</p><p>Light nodded in understanding. “Thank you, Matsuda-san. I’ll be sure to keep that in mind.”</p><p>The older man gave him somewhat of a sad, reproachful, lopsided smile, before turning to walk to the elevator, and waving to him before the doors slid closed. He returned the wave, then watched the numbers go up until they reached Matsuda’s floor, pressing the carriage button as soon as it did. </p><p>When the elevator reached the ground floor once more, he stepped inside with purpose he hadn’t possessed before. As the carriage ascended upward, he fought back the almost overpowering urge to smirk, but refrained from doing so, as he knew the cameras were still in place. He was aware that out of everyone, he had the ability to work the complicated system the paranoid detective had set up himself best, but it was still in good practice not to react the way he wished to outwardly—at least not yet. </p><p>When he walked to the room he kept his head low, eyes tracing the moving patterns in the carpet as he walked across them slowly, however, it was all he couldn’t do to hold his neck high and smile triumphantly—he should be able to, after all—but the this wasn’t quite the time. Someday, it would be. He’d be patient; he knew the virtue quite too well. </p><p>Opening the door as he bit his lip, keeping the victorious grin from slathering itself upon his otherwise composed face, he took in the sights before him, but instead of feeling the chest stirring, victorious feeling he’d expected in this moment, he instead felt lost and hollow, invisible relics of what once was, and now never could be, invading his nostrils, his lungs, overwhelming his now slightly open and disgruntled mouth, his brain—</p><p>He shook his head savagely as if throwing the immediate feeling off of him like a dog shaking away a hound of fleas, and cleared his mind as he inhaled deeply, then exhaled. He was just tired, he had to be. Anyone who had put as much thought and effort into what he just had would be exhausted—and now it was his time to rest, peacefully, as he hadn’t in the longest time. </p><p>The exultant grin now finding its way back upon his face, he walked to the shower, removing his clothes and tossing them lazily into the half empty bin beside him. He’d have Matsuda or someone else take care of stuff like that now. Maybe Mogi, since he didn’t doubt the younger’s ability to somehow fuck things up that didn’t even require instruction. </p><p>As he stood in the shower, the warm water—a temperature <i>he</i> actually liked it at, and didn’t have to adjust it for another demanding presence beside him—caressed his skin softly as it rained upon him, almost thanking him for his presence, appropriate for the God that he was. Now, he could move about freely: walking underneath to the shower head one moment, and heading over to the shower bench another—it didn’t matter. There was no vice, no metal grip on his arm preventing him from doing so. He could do as he liked, from this point on. </p><p>Regardless, he still found himself getting out of the shower ahead of time, in only a few minutes—much like he was accustomed to when he had been forced to do so. He chalked it up to still being used to such a pattern—doing something so routinely would do that to you—he’d done it for the past few days, anyway, and the cuff hadn’t been on him at those times, either. </p><p>After he walked back into the bedroom, he changed into his silkiest pajamas—fit for a king, which he was, and laid in the center of the bed, arms spread out wide. Yes, all of this was his now, and it had been gifted to him, by way of his actions. </p><p>However, when he closed his eyes he couldn’t help but feel that nagging, pressuring feeling of hollowness again, almost as if his organs were being sucked from his body one by one, leaving him to remain as a carcass, still masquerading as a human in his daily activities. </p><p>He threw his eyes open, quickly trying to ground himself the best he could. This would pass. He hadn’t slept well for the past few days, as the excitement had been eating away at his fingers and toes, his entire body tingling at the sensation to victory that had been so close at the time. Now, he’d achieved it, and the lack of sleep was causing him to act adversely. That was all. </p><p>Trying to shut his eyes once more and relax, he suddenly felt the bed dropping from underneath him, as if he were sinking, further and further, rushing as quickly as possible to the bottom of the tower, to the main investigation room. He was going to fall to his death, and crash, shattering his plans just as he’d achieved them, and—</p><p>Almost if on cue, the navy blue chair cushion which had been resting upward against the headstand, where it was last left, fell against his chest, propped up between it and the mattress. </p><p>For a second, he accepted as a semblance of comfort from whatever the fuck was going on, tentatively touching it first with his fingertips, hand, then his entire arm, desperately needing to be grounded, needing something to bring him back to reality. </p><p>As he did, he relaxed, mind finally calming from whatever sort of episode that was. He’d never had one before, as it was quite foreign to him and he desperately hoped that he wouldn’t experience one again. </p><p>Only when he’d started tracing patterns atop the fabric of the cushion did he realize what he was doing, mild panic set in him all over again. He took the aberration and threw it across the room with all his force, hearing more than seeing it hit a large, bronze cart along the way—sending an empty tray, likely covered in leftover crumbs, skirting across the floor with a loud ‘clang’!</p><p>He sluggishly turned over onto his stomach, groaning, almost nauseated as he felt his innards churning disgustingly underneath him, burying his face in the actual <i>real</i> pillow that lay on the bed, eyes stinging heartily against his eyelids. When he shut them again, he was met with a similar fate, although he couldn’t, or rather refused to, place the feeling and reason as to why he was experiencing it. </p><p>His heart strummed roughly in his chest, faster than he’d ever previously felt, mind reeling with culminating images all the while. He was sinking again, the mattress and floors bottomless as he cascaded downward, weightless, the empty rooms swallowing up his existence as he continued his rapturous descent. </p><p><i>No,</i> he inhaled sharply. <i>This wasn’t real, he was hallucinating. None of this was possible, and it wasn’t happening. Focus your mind on the present. You’re in the same bed you’ve slept in for months, the same surroundings—minus one key object—one of warmth, and cleverness, and everything you’d ever hoped to find in something else, someone else, anything else, and—</i></p><p>
  <i>No. That wasn’t helping, that was making everything worse. What the hell was wrong with him? His breathing quickened once more, and he forced his mind to consider his victory, and the pleasure that should come with it. He should be celebrating, not panicking. Yes, he’d won. The main obstacle in his way—the one that resembled him more than anything else—was gone, permanently out of his way, never to return. He wanted this. He’d wanted this. He’d won, and the world was going to be his, and it was going to be perfect. No distractions, no frustrating, equally matched bastard that irritated him to his wits end but also challenged him like no other, giving him a purpose, placing meaning in his actions, allowing him something he’d never had and would never have again—yes. That was gone. Everything was perfect.</i>
</p><p>Through his thought process, as he tried to calm his racing heart, he instead felt the buildup of anticipation and loss, as if signaling the end of an era, or perhaps the emergence of a new one. As the idea flitted across his mind, electronic illuminations of red and white and dark, shiny, reflective grey tainted them, confirm the notion as he inhaled and exhaled deeply—as he willed himself to calm, willed himself to calm, willed himself to calm—</p><p>Everything would be fine, as it already was. The world was now in his palm, and he could play with it, reform it as he pleased. It would be easy, so easy, but that was what he had been fighting for, wasn’t it? To do as he pleased, without outside forces standing in his way, preventing him from doing so?</p><p>He could no longer feel his heartbeat, though he knew his pulse was still there, the newfound hollowness preventing any motion or activity inside from being felt. </p><p>His return would be glorious, and he would be worshipped more than ever, as a God should. Yes, this is what he’d been waiting for. To be praised, although something about the words seemed hollow in comparison to others he’d previously heard, placed on a proverbial alter and be obeyed, as he demanded, which his followers would gladly accommodate. He’d behave as a proper God should, and would. His reign would last for decades, and continue past that, his influence lasting for centuries beyond. Yes, his reign would be immortal, any distractions in the past long forgotten, no matter how persistent, how strong, smart, and witty, no matter how worthy of consideration they were, </p><p>He knew that Gods didn’t Fall. </p><p>So He wouldn’t.</p>
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